Thursday, January 8, 2009

Who am I? How am I doing? Where am I headed?

Who am I? How am I doing? Where am I headed? These are the checkpoint questions I have learned to ask myself as a result of many years of personal growth and spiritual development. I didn't get where I am by accident. I believe in destiny, fate, God's plan, call it what you may. Each life experience taught me lessons from which I can better myself. The recent breakup with my boyfriend is yet one more experience from which I can take time to reflect on who I am and how I am doing, then decide where I am headed. I am a single mother. I have lived, other than the eleven years I was married to the father of my children, as a single woman. It has been a difficult journey with many ups and downs. Raising my children, as a single mother, was the most challenging and most rewarding part of that journey. They have grown into productive, joyful, healthy individuals and they are a source of great pride. I look forward to enjoying many years with my grandchildren helping them grow into happy and healthy adults. I am an educator. I have taught in public and private schools and am now retired. However, I continue to tutor and am going back to substitute teaching. My journey as one who is gainful and productive continues in a positive manner. For this I am grateful. I am a friend. Thank goodness for the girlfriends who have supported me through the last few months of struggle and suffering. I return their friendship in many ways and with that we continue a lifelong relationship. I am a daughter. I am not doing too well with this part of my being. Watching mom in her illness saddens me as I can not make her well. I try to concentrate on the gifts she still has which is a sharp mind and good counsel. My journey with her is treasured and I try to remain present and focused when I am with her. I am single and available. I am forever the optimist maintaining a hopeful outlook that one day my true love will come. As I get older, I question such frivolity of thought, but it is who I am. I maintain a good figure, healthy outlook, and keep myself active and interesting as I seek a life partner who is in sync with my being. All in all, I am pleased with who I am and how I am doing. The journey through life is always going to be filled with ups and downs, but those are the checkpoints that keep me strong. So I ask of you...how are you doing? where are you headed? I look forward to your comments. Until then, that's how I see it, Karen

20 comments:

Lucy said...

Well Karen as I see it you are a well rounded person that has made choices right or wrong, they had to be made. One thing strikes me is that you face problems head on and deal with life the best you can. I have found over the years I to have had to do the same. One problem I had to let go unsolved is my son in Texas. I can not go down there to face him down, so I have to let it go,. Thake care Karen. Lucy

Jan said...

Hi Karen, you seem to me to be doing very well with your life ,coping with the glitches that happen ,My Husband died at the age of 44 leaving me with four teenage children ! who grew up to be very nice adults lol like you I have worked until four years ago when I retired ,I found the love of this life when I was sixty and he was fifty, eight years later ,life is good ,love Jan xx

Missie said...

I'm still trying to figure out who I am and where I'm going. I would have thought by age 40, I'd have my life figured out by now. LOL

Searching for Peace said...

Seems like you are doing well. I just passed my GED test. Now that I have accomplished that, I believe that I can keep going. On to nursing school for me one way or another. ....hugs, Christine

Alice said...

Hi Karen. I'm sorry about your break-up with your bf. I gave up on a relationship with anyone over 3yrs ago and just have no interest anymore. Maybe my outlook will change someday but right now I'm not concerned. Do hope you find Mr. Right :).........

DB said...

Karen, you are asking tough questions of yourself and everyone else. I don't understand who I am, if I did I'd probably be shocked, but that won't stop me from trying to. Is anyone ever doing as well as they want to or can? It seems to me there is always something more to do or to do better. As I head into my 70s the last question now seems to be the hardest. It is possible, but not always pleasant, to look back ar where I've been, but all I can do now is blindly trust that somehow I'm headed in the right direction. DB

Ora said...

Not sure how I would summarize my life...it has been good, bad, and indifferent from time to time..but I have a strong faith in the Lord, and I love folks...and have a special bond with all my internet families...some I have met...others I just know in my heart..but you seem to have a handle on life and what it has delt you...you didn't back down...you stayed strong in yourself...that is good...and the family appreciates all you have done...it shows...God Bless..hugs...Ora

Paula said...

Karen I was widowed at age 50. Quickly realized I must pull myself up by the boot straps and go on. I lived alone eight years and then met John. We are so different it gets pitiful sometime but we're making it. I think you are the type person who will make it too no matter what life throws at you.

Janie said...

Sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders. My daughter and I have decided that we do not want another man if something happens to the ones we have. hehe Hope you find someone and sure you are wise enough now to find a good one. Know how it is with a aging parent. We all grow old and that is not fun. Keep you in my prayers. Hope you have a blessed week. Blessings, Janie

Joyce said...

Sounds like you are right on track. Me? I'm doing OK for my age. I'm not heading anywhere in particular. Just enjoying my quiet country life and my retirement. Thanks for asking.
Hugs, Joyce

Bucko (a.k.a., Ken) said...

Sorry to hear about the breakup with your boyfriend. You have been putting your focus where you need to recently, and your good qualities will result in a new relationship soon :o)

krissy knox said...

Wonderful post, Karen! And thanks for coming by my blog! You sound like a well rounded and well grounded person!

How am I doing? Where am I headed? I am a Christian, a servant of the Most High God. I'm a wife to John, family member of a beautiful and loving family, and a fundraiser dedicated to making life easier for cancer survivors -- and eventually helping to end cancer.

I am someone who strives to make life better for others -- by inspiring, bringing hope, and encouraging each person "to be the best you you can be!"

How do I encourage someone to be the best "you you can be"? I encourage him/her to take personal ownership of his life (others can't ruin one's life -- one would have to give this power to them). Each person must realize that he, with the Lord's help and direction can change his life. And what he can't change, he can accept, and adjust his attitude accordingly.

To encourage someone to be the best "you you can be," I also encourage them to look for solutions, and to be creative (we all have creativity within b/c we are made in the image of God -- the ultimate Creator!).

Finally, to "be the best you you can be," I encourage others to be proactive, take what action is necessary when called to in life -- whether big or small, and thank God for the results! Then repeat process!

I also remind someone that to be their best, he/she must have a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus is more important than anything else in life, as without Him all is naught (for nothing). Without Him, any success would be meaningless. And you just can't "be the best you you can be" without Him.

This is my mission in life. To strive to help others be all they can be. To be "the best you you can be." And at the same time, practice being the best Me I can be. I'll be my best by loving God and others, and by showing others how to do the same. And by doing everything I can the best way I know how. By being proactive and active in all things the Lord shows me to do, even when it's scary.

Hope this is making sense. So where am I going? I'm just trying to practice out these principles in all I do. Sometimes it gets hard and it gets scary, when I have to do something new. But with the Lord's help, I take action and do it anyway! :) So that's where I am at. This year I want to move forward, not being afraid to do things I hitherto were afraid to do. How can I be my best me, and inspire and encourage others, if I am not practicing what I preach? Okay, so this year I want to be "active" and "exceed the limit"! Oh, ya, and be humble too, LOL. Becaue we do know it all comes from God. I am being serious...

Thanks for a fantastic post. You inspire me.

krissy knox :)
my main blog: Sometimes I Think
Hey Jlanders (former AOL bloggers)-- We have a Directory of Blogs. Please post your blogs there!: from jland to blogger
Follow me on Twitter: www.twitter.com/iamkrissy

krissy knox said...

Okay, so I'm back! I just about read your whole blog, LOL. I don't believe we've formally met. I'm Krissy. I've been blogging for almost 5 years. I started out as one of the originals at AOL. I know you've commented at Someitmes I Think before, my blog, so that's how I found my way here.

I couldn't figure out why I couldn't quite place your name or blog. It's because I just hadn't met you yet. Wow, you've got a lot of friends (followers). How did you do that so quickly, LOL? You are well known around JLand (formerly known as AOL JournalLand or JLand). I guess we are still calling ourselves Jland. I call us "from jland to blogger." did you sign the directory? If you used to be at AOL, then go ahead and sign the "from jland to blogger" directory that I am creating, okay? The blog URL is below, just click the link.

Anyway, nice to meet you. I missed your arrival to jland because I was at the hospital (I was there almost the whole month of October, save a few days), with my husband John. I was also there some of Nov. and Dec. Half the time the past three months, John was in the hospital. I am his caregiver. I hate the word caregiver, as I am his spouse. Nonetheless, I was his caregiver, and missed a lot of what was going on in jland, and the blogosphere as a whole. So I missed your entrance!

My husband had two cancers and a bone marrow transplant 3 years ago and has been having complications as of late, is why he is hospitalized a lot. I haven't gotten to blog a lot because I have been at the hospital with him (Hershey Med Center), or nursing him at home. I was doing home IVs for awhile! But he is okay again now, and walking around the house like nothing ever happened, like he didn't almost die two months ago...

I'm sorry, Karen. I'm talking to you about serious stuff. Here's something light hearted for you I wanted to tell you about. My sister Val has a blog you may want to check out, and it reminds me of the saying in your blog header. Her blog is called Joy In The Rain. She wrote a poem about it. That is how she got the title of her blog. The poem was about having rain, but still being able to have joy, no matter what, and dancing in the rain. Karen, the blog is so full of joy. Sometimes it is serious, but most of the time it is just a bunch of fun and levity. She does jokes, cartoons, quotes, inspirational quotes, bible verses, etc. She specializes in blonde jokes, LOL. Here's the URL:
http://joyintherain-val.blogspot.com/

Okay, gotta run. By the way, I'm going to follow you. I like your blog. You're informative, creative, direct, intelligent. All things I like! Oh, and fun. ;) So I am going to follow you. I am the ruby red mary jane crocs, LOL.

krissy knox :)
my main blog: Sometimes I Think
Hey Jlanders (former AOL bloggers)! Please post your blogs in the Directory of Blogs: from jland to blogger
Follow me on Twitter: www.twitter.com/iamkrissy

Beth said...

Karen, I'm really sorry to hear about your breakup. I think it's a good thing to do a self-assessment, though, and learn what lessons you can from such things. You've obviously got a great head on your shoulders, and a good heart, and you can go from there.

Love, Beth

Claudia's thoughts said...

I think we are all on a journey.. It changes as we get older and wiser. We are the same people just more seasoned and some times we surprise ourselves, and sometime our Karma is just off..But most days are good.

Indigo said...

I've come to find no matter how bad the day is, it never last and to ask myself if this is as bad as it gets is it really so bad? These days I've found more acceptance and grace with myself. Sounds like you have a postive attitude to carry you forward into the coming year. I've always thought you had a wonderous spirit dear friend. As for the breakup. He didn't know what he was missing out on. (Hugs)Indigo

Bea said...

January seems to be the time to reflect upon one's history while contemplating one's future. It's good to do a self-evaluation from time to time...helps keep us on track if we intended to be somewhere, or to be someone. I'm in transition myself...have been since last year... changed positions at work, so I've had to ask myself those very same questions. You are a courageous woman, Karen. It would take a blog entry to answer those questions, but in brief: I am my mother's daughter, my husband's wife, my son's mother, and one of God's Children. I think I'm doing well enough as I head into the mature years of my life, but something happens every day to shake me up if I'm in my comfort zone. I'm beginning to believe we aren't supposed to feel comfortable for very long.

ADB said...

Karen,
I'm not a regular reader of your blog, but will say that the onset of a new year tends to be a time for introspection for many of us.

Guido
http://atlantic-lines.blogspot.com

Tracy said...

hi friend! sorry to hear about you and bf but im sure you will find someone new soon enough, you seem like a great person and have alot to offer! hows your mom doing? i hope you have a good week. hugs

Lucy said...

I hope your mom is doing well or at least better. Hope all is good for the rest of your haPPENINGS in your life. Lucy